When my calendar became my boss - how did I take back control?
Spoiler Alert! If you just want to get to the point:
| Problem | Solution | Result |
|---|---|---|
| Overcrowded calendar, constant stress | Conscious time blocking, prioritisation | More free time, less stress |
| "I'll sort it all out" attitude | Delegation and Borders setting up | More effective teamwork, a better balanced life |
| Always available status | Digital detox and offline timelines | Increased creativity and presence |
Want the full story? Read on!
It was Sunday evening, my seventh consecutive weekend of work, when I realized: my calendar was no longer my tool - I had become its tool. The colour blocks lined up on the screen were like a wall separating me from everything that really mattered to me. Remember what it feels like to breathe freely?
The moment when the glass is full
I was sitting in my office at 7 pm, while my children were already asleep. My wife's message flashed on my phone, "You're not having dinner with us tonight?" That was the moment I realised something was very wrong.
The next morning, I had my usual coffee and didn't look at my leaves first. Instead, I wrote on a blank sheet of paper three questions:
- Why do I feel that I don't have enough time?
- Is every meeting really necessary?
- Who really controls my life?
The first steps towards change
The first thing I did was to check my calendar from the previous week. And what I saw shocked me. Instead of a 40-hour work week, I actually spent 68 hours working. Of those, 22 hours were meetings, at least 10 of which were meetings where I really only had to be "present". Even my 15-minute lunch breaks were scheduled.
Then I realised: the chaos was not coming from outside. I created it, by taking it all on.
How did I take back control?
1. Reallocating my time
First, I set aside two hours each morning for "deep work" - a time when no one could disturb me. At first this met with huge resistance from my colleagues. "But you were always available!" - I heard many times. But I persevered, and after a few weeks, the results were starting to show. I got more done in less time.
2. Discovering the power of "No"
That was the hardest one. For years I thought the good Manager always available, always helping. But I realised: when you say yes to everyone, you're actually saying yes to yourself. your priorities you say no.
I started to be selective and when I was asked to do something, the first thing I asked myself was, "Is this really my job? Am I the best person to do this?" If the answer was not a clear yes, I delegated or simply said no.
3. Setting digital boundaries
I have introduced "email free" periods. I only checked my mail three times a day, not every 5 minutes. And I put my phone on silent after 7 pm. At first I had panic attack-like feelings - what if I missed something? But I soon realised: the world wouldn't fall apart if I didn't react immediately.
The breakthrough moment
Three months had passed, when one Monday morning I noticed something strange: my stomach didn't cramp at the sight of my weekly calendar. My appointments had been halved. I was meeting deadlines while being home by 5pm on Fridays. And the most astonishing thing: my team's performance had not deteriorated, it had improved!
I realised that continuous availability is not really a sign of efficiency - but of Borders the absence of. When I did my best for everyone, I couldn't really do my best for anyone.
The lesson
The time management it's not about cramming more into a day. It's about focusing on the right things and having the courage to let go of what doesn't serve us.
Today, my calendar no longer controls me, I control my calendar. And in the process, I have not only become a better leader, but a better parent, a better partner and most importantly, a more balanced person.
Does this story sound familiar to you? Do you feel like you've lost control of your time? You are not alone. Many people struggle with similar challenges, and sometimes it's hard to find a way out on your own.
A CoachLab Coaching Services team understand these challenges and help you take back control of your time, not the other way around. An personalised coaching process, we will uncover the real reasons and work together to develop strategies that work in your life.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How long does it take to make a real difference in time management?
A: In our experience, after 4-6 weeks of conscious practice, there is a noticeable change, but the deep, long-term results usually require 3-6 months of consistent work.
Q: Do I have to give up spontaneity if I want to manage my time better?
A: Not at all! In fact, the effective time management just allows more room for spontaneity, because you have already allocated time for the essentials.
Q: How do I get started if I feel I've completely lost control of my time?
A: The first step is always awareness. For just one week, observe and make a note of what you're actually spending your time on. That alone can lead to insights that will start the change. And if you need help with this process, we at CoachLab are happy to support you on this journey.
