Not good at self-marketing either? Guess what! How can you improve in this area?
When we have to talk about the merits of others, we often gush, enthusiastically extolling their achievements and abilities. But when it comes to putting ourselves first, we suddenly become silent or uncomfortable. This phenomenon is extremely common - especially among people who would otherwise have excellent leadership skills.
What is self-marketing like?
Self-marketing or self-advertising olyan tudatos tevékenységek összessége, amelyek során az egyén saját értékeit, képességeit, eredményeit és személyes márkáját építi és kommunikálja a külvilág felé. Lényegében önmagunk ""selling, marketing" és pozicionálása a szakmai vagy személyes életben.
The key elements of self-marketing:
1. Personal branding
It involves identifying and highlighting the unique qualities, values and competences that set us apart from others. What do we want people to immediately associate with our name or person?
2. Communicating of values and results
Our ability to speak effectively and convincingly about our own achievements, successes and professional experience without sounding pretentious or discredited.
3. Establishing an online and offline presence
Conscious management of professional online profiles (like LinkedIn / e.g. Rob's coach LinkedIn page/, professional website, blog) and the image created by personal appearances, presentations, comments, publications.
4. Building and maintaining relationships
Building and maintaining a strategic network of relationships that support our professional goals and increase our visibility in the field.
5. Positioning
Önmagunk elhelyezése a szakmai hierarchiában és piacon - mit nyújtunk, miben vagyunk különlegesek vagy egyediek, milyen problémákat oldunk meg hatékonyan.
The paradox of self-marketing
Képzeld, én sem voltam jó benne, sőt, még ma sem vagyok olyan profi, mint akinek ez a "vérében van, vagy magába szívta az anyatejjel" De keményen dolgozom rajta. Elismerem, nem egyszerű!
Hogy a magam példáival éljek: "Még a mai napig, sok éves felsővezetői háttérrel a hátam mögött is tanulom, coachcsal és self-coachingban is dolgozom rajta, hogy magamról is tudjak olyan profin, felmagasztaló módon és extra pozitívan beszélni, írni mint bármelyik csapatom tagjáról, beosztottamról. Azaz mást nagyon profin tudok marketingelni! Tudok az eredményeiért, vagy akár csak a önmagáért, de az érdemeiért is nagyon elismerni, elismertetni, dicsérni és kifelé is megmutatni."
This testimony perfectly sums up the inner struggle that many of us experience. As leaders, we are able to notice, appreciate and highlight the achievements of others, but when it comes to making a similarly positive statement about ourselves, something holds us back.
The question is why this dichotomy exists and how can we change it?
Why do we struggle with self-marketing?
Cultural background? Cultural context?
Magyarországon (és sok más közép-európai országban) a szerénység hagyományosan nagy érték (volt?). Már gyermekkorunkban azt tanultuk, hogy "ne dicsekedj", "ne hívd fel magadra a figyelmet". Ezek a kulturális normák mélyen belénk ivódnak, és később, felnőttként is befolyásolják viselkedésünket. Azért ma már ezen igyekszünk javítani és változtatni, ahogy kinyílt a világ, többek között a globalizáció is lehetővé tette ezt.
Here is an example of my own:
I have a very good example of my own cultural background. When I did one of my MBAs or graduated from university, we went abroad and others came here. And a good example of that is the American students. A lot of you know this, you know this because I mentioned it several times to similar questions. And it's not true, of course, especially you can't draw conclusions from it or generalize, but it's a highlighted but good example of the cultural issue above.
Mikor itt voltak a nálunk, magyarországon a diákok USA-ból, s kaptunk csoportos feladatot az egyetemen, mi magyarok leszegtük a fejünket és légedetlenül álltunk hozzá, hogy már megint feladat, amin dolgozni kell...
Does this sound familiar?
What was the attitude of the American students?
Na szerinted? Hurrá optimizmus! Nem vicc, örültek, hogy remek feladaton dolgozhatnak csapatukkal és versenyben a magyarokkal... Tudnám hosszasan mesélni, de a lényeg, hogy midenki megcsinálta a feladatot és hát várt vagy nem várt, de nagy különbség volt a szintben, a minőségben a kidolgozás mélységében és szinte mindenben. Persze az előadás, a prezentáció is nagyon durva kontraszt volt.
Can you guess?
Based on the above, that is, in the first part, in short, we were indeed an order of magnitude better in quality, while the presentation, that is, how we presented it and how good the task marketing or self-marketing was, tipped the scales in favour of the American students.
Vagyis, mi nagyon profin nagyon jól megcsináltuk, de nem tudtuk profin és olyan szinten büszkén előadni, mint a külföldi diáktársaink, annak ellenére, hogy valóban profin megoldottuk a feladatot, amit ők sem rosszul, de jóval gyengébben csináltak meg. Elég is volt a példából, mert többek között az írás következő pontja is biztosan hátráltatott minket, magyarokat...
Fear of being judged
Many people are afraid that if they talk too much about their achievements, others will think they are arrogant or conceited. This fear is often unfounded, but it is still a very real obstacle.
The impact of impostor syndrome
"Többen vagyunk így ezzel" – és valóban, az imposztorszindróma különösen elterjedt a vezetők körében. Ez azt a jelenséget írja le, amikor valaki – függetlenül tényleges sikereitől – úgy érzi, nem érdemli meg a pozícióját, és attól tart, hogy mások előbb-utóbb "leleplezik".
Of course, behind this can also be knowing that we already know so much about something that we feel as if it is so little that others must know more. And, of course, this is not by accident.
The dilemma of credibility
A másik véglet az, amikor valaki "sokkal többet hirdet magáról, mint amit megvalósított, vagy akár ami az ő érdeme". Ez a fajta túlzott önpromóció hosszú távon visszaüthet, és alááshatja a bizalmat. A megfelelő egyensúly megtalálása kulcsfontosságú.
Why is self-marketing important?
Career development
Being able to communicate our values and achievements is essential for career progression. If we do not, others will not do it for us.
Business opportunities
Különösen vállalkozóként, freelancerként, szabadúszóként, vagy vezetői pozícióban lévőként kritikus, hogy tudjuk magunkat és kompetenciáinkat hatékonyan "eladni".
Building professional credibility
Presenting ourselves well strengthens our professional credibility and helps us to be taken seriously by others.
Setting an example
As leaders, we also set an example to our team on how to evaluate their own work and communicate their results.
Ways to develop self-marketing
1. Coaching as an effective tool
"A coachingról biztosan tudom, hogy nagyon hatékonyan segíthet ebben, persze ehhez kell az ügyfél is, aki ezen hajlandó keményen dolgozni a coachcsal…"
Coaching can indeed be an excellent tool for developing self-marketing. A good coach can help:
- To recognise our own values and strengths
- Processing deep-rooted inhibitions and fears
- Develop effective communication strategies
- Practise in different situations in a protected environment
2. Work with self-knowledge
The first step is always to developing self-awareness. Nem tudjuk hatékonyan "eladni" magunkat, ha nem vagyunk tisztában saját értékeinkkel.
Practical tip:
Make a detailed inventory of your professional successes, even the smallest ones. Write down the challenges we faced, how we overcame them and what we achieved. This list is not only about self-confidence but also as concrete material for future self-presentation.
3. Collecting and processing feedback
External feedback can be extremely valuable, as others often see our strengths better than we do.
A practical tip for our customers:
Ask for structured feedback from colleagues, superiors, subordinates using the 360-degree evaluation method. Organise the information received and use it to enhance your self-awareness.
4. Finding the right communication style
Authentic self-marketing is not the same as bragging. The goal is to find a style that is factual, authentic and personal.
Practical tip:
Collect examples of people who we think communicate their own achievements effectively, without appearing boastful. Note what language they use, what proportion of their talk is about themselves and their team, how they frame their successes.
5. Progressive practice
Like all skills, self-marketing can be developed with practice.
Practical tip:
Start in a smaller, safer environment - for example, among friends or at less important professional events. Gradually increase the stakes as you become more confident.
6. Building an authentic personal brand
The long-term goal is to create a personal brand that reflects our true values and professional identity.
Practical tip:
Identify the key values and competences that you want to be associated with your name. Develop a consistent communication strategy around these, which will be reflected across all platforms - from our LinkedIn profile to conference presentations.
Finding the balance
"Ettől függetlenül, akik nem erősek ebben, azok számára van jó hírem, it can be learned and improved." - Rob
The goal is not to suddenly change our communication style completely, but to find a balance that is comfortable and authentic for us, while at the same time professionally beneficial. And this is very important, because if we overdo it, we can put our need for this kind of development on the back burner for life, so be sensible!
Credibility vs. visibility
Credibility always comes before mere visibility. Too much self-promotion can easily backfire, especially in the long run. At the same time, excessive modesty can also hamper our careers.
Results vs. personality
A hatékony self-marketing középpontjában az eredmények állnak, nem pedig a személyiség. Nem azt kell kommunikálnunk, hogy "milyen csodálatos emberek vagyunk", hanem hogy milyen konkrét értéket teremtettünk.
Individual vs. team results
"Sokan más érdemeit is saját eredményeikként szeretik feltüntetni. Jó ez így? Nem 100%, de szerintem tuti nem!" - Rob
Nem egy ilyen vezető kollégával dolgoztam már, így van szépen negatív, nem követendő példa. (Persz hozzáteszem, hoyg többen így értek el jó pozíciókat, s közben vastagon tapostak lefelé.) - hát ez mindenkinek a saját döntése, az én világomba például egyáltalán nem illeszkedik.
As a leader, it is important to find a balance between communicating individual and team results. It is indeed unethical to misappropriate the successes of your team - but it is also important to recognise your own leadership role in those successes.
Self-coaching as a tool
If an external coachis not available, self-coaching methods can also help with personal development.
Practical tip:
Keep a regular (for example weekly) reflective diary to record:
- Professional successes in a given period
- The positive feedback we have received
- Situations where you have managed to communicate your value effectively
- Situations where self-assertion has been difficult
- Specific development objectives in this area for the next period.
És a lényeg...
The ability to self-market is not an innate gift, but a skill that can be learned and developed. As the thought quoted at the beginning of this article shows, even experienced managers are working on this.
Our cultural background, personal experiences and the patterns we have learned throughout our lives all influence our ability to talk confidently about our achievements. But with coaching, self-awareness work and conscious practice, we can make significant progress!
The goal is not to go to the other end of the scale and over-promote, but to find an authentic and balanced communication style that allows you to present your professional values in the right way.
Mert ahogy a mondás tartja: "Ha nem beszélsz magadról, mások sem fognak helyetted." És végső soron csak így tudjuk biztosítani, hogy szakmai értékünk valódi elismerést nyerjen.
Frequently Asked Questions about Self-marketing
Why is it that many leaders find it difficult to "sell" themselves while representing their team excellently?
This paradox is the result of several factors. On the one hand, the cultural background (modesty is a strong value, especially in Hungary and Central Europe), and on the other hand, the impostor syndrome, which makes many people feel that they are not worthy enough of their position. As leaders, we often find it difficult to emphasize our own merits because we are used to focusing on the achievements of the team. In addition, many people fear being perceived as arrogant or boastful if they emphasize their own accomplishments.
What are the most effective ways to develop self-marketing skills?
The most effective self-marketing development methods include coaching (either with the help of an external coach or in the form of self-coaching), self-awareness work (systematic mapping of your own successes and values), collecting and processing structured feedback, gradual practice in a safe environment, and consciously building an authentic personal brand. It is also important to keep a regular reflective diary in which we record our successes and areas for improvement.
What is the difference between authentic self-marketing and bragging?
Authentic self-marketing is factual, results-based and relevant to the situation. It addresses not only ourselves but also the role of our team and acknowledges the contribution of others. Bragging, on the other hand, makes exaggerated claims, misappropriates team results, is done in an irrelevant context and often devalues the role of others. The goal of authentic self-marketing is not to brag, but to demonstrate our true value and competencies in a way that provides useful information to others.
How can we find the right balance between excessive modesty and excessive self-promotion?
To find balance, we first need to know our own values and achievements. It is important to focus our communication on concrete facts and results, not on general positive statements about ourselves. It's worth observing role models who we think manage this balance well. Choosing the right context is also important: there are situations (e.g. job interviews, promotion meetings) where we are explicitly expected to talk about our achievements. It can be useful to seek external feedback on how our self-presentation affects others.
What are the specific career benefits of advanced self-marketing skills?
Developing self-marketing skills has many benefits: it increases our visibility in the professional community, helps us to get career opportunities (promotion, new job, projects), strengthens our negotiating position for a salary increase or promotion, gives us more credibility in management, helps us to build the right network of contacts and increases our self-confidence. And as an entrepreneur or freelancer, it can be vital for your livelihood. In the longer term, conscious and authentic self-marketing can build a personal brand that opens doors and attracts professional opportunities.
