Impostor syndrome: why do you feel you're not good enough and how can you overcome it?
"Anything I achieve is just luck. Sooner or later, everyone realises I'm not as good as they think."
Familiar thoughts? If so, you may also have impostor syndrome.
Impostor syndrome is an inner insecurity that makes people feel they don't deserve their success and will soon be exposed. Despite external feedback and results, they are plagued by doubts inside. But why does it happen and how can it be overcome?
I will describe the causes of impostor syndrome; at least the most common ones I have encountered in my clients' cases, and in my own. (Of course, the examples are not exactly the same as previous client problems, nor are the first names mentioned. So I will now describe below the signs and effects of impostor syndrome. I will also show how the coaching to free you from this paralysing feeling and help you reach your full potential.
What is impostor syndrome?
The term imposter syndrome was first used in 1978 by psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes. They observed that many successful people feel that they do not deserve recognition and are in fact not as competent as others think.
This phenomenon does not only affect managers or people in high positions. It can affect anyone, from students to entrepreneurs. People with imposter syndrome often struggle with the following thoughts:
- "My success is just a matter of chance."
- "Others are better at it, I just get away with it."
- "They will soon realise that I am not good enough."
- "I don't deserve the praise."
"I remember the first time I sat down in a company meeting in front of the board of directors to present my project. Even though we'd already run three successful campaigns and all the data showed I was doing well, my inner voice kept me up all night saying, 'You're going down. They'll all see that you don't really know what you're doing." Sound familiar? It was similar to this. one of my clients' first encounter with impostor syndrome, although he didn't know it had a name at the time."
Why does impostor syndrome develop?
Impostor syndrome can be caused by several factors:
(Before you read any further, I suggest you think about whether there has ever been a similar case in your case.
1. Childhood patterns and family influences
If you were a child and found that you got love and recognition based on your performance, it's easy to develop a sense of always having to prove yourself. And striving for perfection can set the stage for imposter syndrome.
2. Social pressure and expectations
In modern society, there is a strong emphasis on success and results. Social media in particular amplifies this, as many people only show their successes, making it easy to believe that others are more competent than us.
3. Comparison with others
If you constantly compare yourself to others, especially those who are more experienced or successful, you can easily underestimate your own worth.
4. Perfectionism
Perfectionists often feel that they are never good enough. If their performance is not 100% perfect, they feel they have failed.
One case:
"Panna, a 38-year-old finance manager, felt she could be "caught out" at any time, even after two promotions. During our coaching process, she realised that as a child she always had to perform perfectly, without fail, to get attention from her parents or those around her. After six months of working together, Panna learned to value her own knowledge. And recently she applied for a higher position herself - which she was very happy and satisfied to get."
How does impostor syndrome affect your life?
If you are not dealing with imposter syndrome, but it is still present in your life, it can cause serious problems in the long run:
- Stress and anxiety: The constant fear of being "caught" can lead to mental exhaustion.
- Lack of confidence: You are afraid to take on new challenges because you fear failure.
- Procrastination or overcompensation: Either you keep putting things off, or you overdo it to prove you're good enough.
- Dissatisfaction: Even if you achieve success, you can't be happy about it because you always feel you don't deserve it.
Can it help? How can coaching help to overcome imposter syndrome?
If you feel that imposter syndrome is holding you back, we can help, because a coach can help you to overcome these limiting beliefs. Here's how:
1. Self-reflection and awareness
The first step is to recognise what thoughts are holding you back. A coach can certainly help you to map out the internal narratives that make you underestimate yourself.
2. Developing a realistic self-assessment
During coaching, we will highlight your achievements and skills. Instead of just seeing your mistakes, you learn to evaluate them objectively.
3. Awareness of past successes
We often forget how much we have achieved. A coach will help you to organise and make you aware of your past successes, so that you can see that you really achieved them, not just by luck.
4. Reframing negative thoughts
The impostor syndrome is often fuelled by an inner critical voice. In a coaching process, you learn to recognise and reframe these thoughts.
5. Action plan and support
Coaching helps you not only to understand how imposter syndrome works, but also to take concrete steps against it. You can work on your own development in a supportive environment.
Why is coaching for imposter syndrome more effective than any other method?:
"Why is it not enough to read a self-improvement book?" - many people ask. The difference is huge: while reading is a passive process, coaching is actively working on your mindset. My questions and feedback target exactly what you need. It's not a general recipe, it's a personalised process; one that makes a real difference."
What can you do today about imposter syndrome?
- Write down your successes! - Make a list of your achievements and see if they are really yours and not just down to luck.
- Tell me about it! - Many more people struggle with this than you might think. It's easier to cope in a supportive community.
- Take the praise! - Don't reject positive feedback, but learn to welcome it.
- Don't strive for perfection, strive for improvement! - Making mistakes is a natural part of learning.
- Get expert help! - If you feel that you can't get out of the imposter syndrome alone, a coach can help.
"We are introducing the Success Diary method for the first time. It is not just a list of your achievements, but a well-structured exercise; where for each success we ask three questions. These are: what was the challenge? What exactly did you do? And most important: what was YOUR personal contribution to the success?
This last question will also help you to realise that your successes are not a fluke; rather, they are the result of your skills and efforts."How do you see it? Tell us about it!
Take the first step now!
Think about it: how many opportunities have you missed out on because you didn't feel thorough or prepared enough? How many job applications have you not submitted, how many times have you not spoken up in a meeting or asked for a raise? Imposter syndrome is not just a bad feeling - it robs you of concrete opportunities. Every day you spend with this limiting belief is another day of not living your full life!!!
If you feel that the impostor syndrome holds you back, don't let it continue to hold you back or limit you! Book a free 10-15 minute online consultation with us; and let's work together to finally believe you're good enough!
"My approach to coaching is to create a safe space where you can honestly explore your doubts. My personal guarantee: if after our first conversation you don't feel you've gained valuable insights, the consultation remains free. Click here and let's overcome the impostor syndrome together!"
